Following Christ English

My fiancé and I are getting married in a couple of months, and we're really looking forward to our lives together. But so many of our friends have already been through at least one divorce, and we don't want that to happen to us. How can we prevent it? The most important thing you can do is to build your marriage on God and His will for your lives. As my wife used to say, a strong marriage actually needs to include three people: the husband, the wife—and God. Begin your life together, therefore, by committing your lives and your marriage to Jesus Christ. Remember: marriage isn’t just a social convenience or a legal custom. Marriage comes from God, and it is one of His greatest gifts to us. When times of stress or disappointment come (and they will), remember that God brought you together, and you made your marriage vows not only to each other but also to Him. Never forget Jesus’ words: “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate” (Mark 10:9). In add

We are not to be ashamed if we suffer for Christ. Rather, Peter instructs us to glorify God instead. Why? Because the suffering we endure on this earth in our service to Christ pales in comparison to the hope of eternity that awaits us in Heaven. On the other hand, “those who do not obey the gospel of God” must still face eternal judgment. The passage is summed up in 1 Peter 4:19, which says, “Therefore let those who suffer according to the will of God commit their souls to Him in doing good, as to a faithful Creator.” We are not promised an easy and carefree life as followers of Jesus. Rather, we are promised that we will experience a “fiery trial;” maybe several trials. There is a cost to following Jesus, which Peter knew well. How will you respond when this happens? Will you become angry with God, turning away from Him? Or will you run towards your heavenly Father, finding peace, understanding and—as unlikely as it sounds—rejoicing in the midst of the fire? We will face

For the foolishness of my people—they do not know me. They are idiotic people and they have no understanding. They have skill at evil, but do not know to do good. Jeremiah 4:22 No man is more pathetic than he who is in great need and is not aware of it. Remember Samson? Standing there in the valley of Sorek, surrounded by the lords of the Philistines, ” … he wist not that the Lord was departed from him.” It has been truly said, “No man is so ignorant as he who knows nothing and knows not that he knows nothing. No man is so sick as he who has a fatal disease and is not aware of it. No man is so poor as he who is destitute, and yet thinks he is rich.” The pitiable thing about the Pharisees was not so much their hypocrisy as it was their utter lack of knowledge of how poor they actually were in the sight of God. There is always something pathetic about a man who thinks he is rich when he is actually poor, who thinks he is good when he is actually vile, who thinks he is educate

1. “They have left this realm of time and space, they have out-stripped us in life’s races, but the sacred memory of their selflessness and the freedom they died to obtain will live forever.” 2. “As we think of the selflessness and heroism of such fellows, we are reminded of the words of Jesus Christ who said: ‘Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." 3. “When we grieve over someone who has died in Christ, we are sorrowing not for them but for ourselves. Our grief isn’t a sign of weak faith, but of great love.” 4. “Even though the sacrifices of our war dead have been great, yet the greatest sacrifice of all time was made by a man on a cross who died not only physically but spiritually that men might live. We have neglected Him too long! We have rejected His plan for peace, and as a result, we have fought, bled and died for centuries!” 5. “Only Christ can meet the deepest needs of our world and our hearts. Christ alone can bring

8) Ask God to Change You. As soon as you begin offering prayers of thankfulness for your spouse, be sure of this: the enemy of your soul and the would-be destroyer of your marriage will remind you where your mate falls short. You can count on it. You’ll find yourself growing resentful: “Why should I thank God that my husband works hard when he comes home and won’t even talk to me at night?” “Why should I thank God that my wife has always been faithful to me when she’s so critical?” You need to respond to this temptation with a healthy spiritual exercise: as soon as you recall your spouse’s weaknesses—the very second those poor qualities come to mind—start asking God to help you with specific weaknesses of your own. That’s right—as backward as this may sound, respond to temptations to judge your mate by praying for God to change you. Go into prayer armed with two lists: your spouse’s strengths, and your weaknesses. This exercise will help maintain a positive spiritual balanc

7) Form Your Heart through Prayer. It’s one thing to know I’m supposed to respect my spouse, but it’s another thing entirely to do it. Can I retrain my heart? Can I spiritually form my mind to accept them as they are? Yes, I can. Prayer can be a very practical tool in this regard. Simply practice praying positive prayers for your spouse. Find the five or six things he or she does really well—or even just one or two!—and try to tire God out by thanking him for giving you a mate with those qualities. Follow up your prayers with comments or even cards that thank your spouse personally for who he or she is. I’ve practiced this with my wife. One morning I awoke early and immediately sensed my frustration from the previous evening. We have an issue in our relationship that we had talked to death over the previous two decades. Lisa acknowledged her need to grow in this area, but events of the previous weeks had convinced me that nothing had changed. I felt resentful, and in my res

6) Accept the Biblical Call to Respect. Here’s what it comes down to. If you’re a believer, the Bible calls you to respect your husband (Ephesians 5:33) or your wife (1 Peter 3:7). It doesn’t say wives should respect perfect husbands, or even godly husbands. It doesn’t say husbands should respect agreeable or unusually loving wives. There are no qualifiers, because biblical respect, in one sense, comes with the position, not with the person. The apostle Paul insulted a man with bold language (“you whitewashed wall!”) but then apologized after he learned he had been speaking to a high priest: “Brothers, I did not realize that he was the high priest; for it is written, ‘Do not speak evil about the ruler of your people'” (Acts 23:3-5). Your spouse, because he/she is your spouse, deserves respect. You may disagree with his judgment; you may object to the way she handles things—but according to the Bible, their position alone calls you to give them proper respect. Note..We’r

5) Accept the Reality of Your Decision. Everyone comes into marriage with their own hurts, wounds, and spiritual “baggage.” Maybe your wife’s siblings teased her. Maybe your husband’s former girlfriend cheated on him and broke his heart. Maybe your spouse’s parents were abusive, or neglectful. The possibilities, sadly, are endless. Before a casual relationship morphs into a permanent commitment, many men and women see a hurting person and think, I want to help them. But something about marriage often turns that around and makes us say, “Why does he have to be that way?” Our spouse’s needs once elicited feelings of nurture and compassion; now those same hurts tempt us toward bitterness and regret. Before we get married is the time to make a character-based judgment (“Do I really want to live with this person’s wounds?”) Once the ceremony has ended, God challenges us to maintain an attitude of concern and nurture instead of resentment and frustration. Can you maintain a soft

4) Accept the Call to Praiseworthy Thinking. I have found Philippians 4:8 as relevant for marriage as it is for life: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Obsessing over your spouse’s weaknesses won’t make them go away. You may have done that for years—and if so, what has it gotten you, besides more of the same? Author and speaker Leslie Vernick warns, “Regularly thinking negatively about your husband increases your dissatisfaction with him and your marriage.” You will have to have to fight the natural human tendency to obsess over your mate’s weaknesses. When I urge you to affirm your spouse’s strengths, I’m not minimizing their many weaknesses. I’m just encouraging you to make the daily spiritual choice of focusing on qualities for which you feel thankful. To make this realistic, you have to keep in mind that no man or woman is